I stand in front of the mirror, motionless. Staring deep into my eyes, I realize just how afraid I am. I manage to pull away from my reflection and look down at my hands. In one hand, I hold a diploma. In the other, a box. The degree is easily recognizable. The standard “special print” paper with a metallic design around the edges compliment the name that is shown boldly in the center – my name. This is what I have been working towards. I now hold the fruit of my accomplishments in my hand. I can see every step, decision, and homework assignment that got me this diploma. I can see it all so clearly. The box, however, is not so clear. It is a simple white box that gives no hints or indication as to what is inside. This box holds my future. I am scared to peek inside, terrified of what I might find. What if this box doesn’t carry what I expect or even want for my life? What if God asks me to do something very different from what I have been preparing myself to do? What if I am disappointed?

“Graduation can be intimidating, but full of blessings and limitless possibilities!” – is what a young graduate may hear, but no words can actually prepare a graduate for the thrust into adulthood. My cannonball entry into the adult world will be happening very soon. Much of my future is unknown. You ask me anything about what is happening after graduation, and I will smile and calmly say that anything could happen, but inside I am shaking. The idea of money (or more so the idea of not having enough) makes my stomach turn. How is this ever supposed to work out?

Even with all of the uncertainties, I am blessed to have a few constants in my life, one of them being Christ. It does give me comfort to know that no matter what happens or where I go, He will be with me. Joshua 1:9 says, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” WhereEVER I go. This means the location. This means decisions. This means in and throughout time. The Lord, my God, will be with me and care for me, just as He cares for a tiny little bird. Matthew 10:29-31 says, “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.”

These verses are just two of the numerous promises of God’s love and care in the Bible. As much as I like to be independent, I need to hold onto these promises as I venture into this new stage of my life. God will not let me down. Even if I am disappointed in where I end up initially, I know that God has a greater plan. Knowing this won’t make the fear go away completely, but it gives me hope. And life being lived with hope is a life worth stepping into.

The box is open. The path is set. Onward I go. Lord lead me.

Rachel Held

Co-host of the Afternoon Drive